I’m 20.

Since I graduated high school two years ago, I’ve been a social recluse. I don’t have any friends I talk to on a regular basis and constantly feel out of touch with the rest of the world, including my family. All my free time is spent either daydreaming or going online excessively. I would stop to do something else in a heartbeat, but there doesn’t seem to be anything else worth doing.

The only thing I want to do at the moment is go to university, learn a lot of things, and get my social life back, but even that seems to be impossible.

I had a chance to go there right out of high school but went to community college instead for stupid reasons. I finished an associate’s degree and got accepted again, but now I can’t afford to go. My parents make too much for me to get enough aid to cover the whole cost and aren’t going to help me at all. They won’t cosign anything or have anything to do with it, and I have $8k to come up with by August, which isn’t going to happen.

My siblings and I have always been poor in all but quantifiable means, because of my parents’ lack of concern for our needs. I have been able to live in their house, and for that I owe them everything and have no business asking them for help. Since I was 13, I wouldn’t eat or get any personal items unless I bought them on my own because my parents claimed to have no money. They are selfish and squander all their money. Even when my grandma died, all they cared about doing was getting my grandpa into a nursing home so they could sell the house they had lived in for the past 30 years. They then took that money and went to Vegas.

Call my parents correct and me disordered for not agreeing with them or whatever; I really don’t care.

I’m so disconnected from reality right now that I just know that I’m never going to make it in the world. Nobody in their right mind would hire me to a job if I quit the one I’m in now, and that one just makes me want to die – I wash dishes in a restaurant and have been doing the same thing for the past 5 years. The guy is friends with my dad, so the only way I’d be able to get away from it is to completely move out of town, which brings me back to the previous point.

I feel completely hopeless all the time. I attempted suicide in Feb 2010 with carbon monoxide but chickened out at the last minute. I don’t want to die, but I don’t know any possible way to solve my problems.

I’m 20.

Since I graduated high school two years ago, I’ve been a social recluse. I don’t have any friends I talk to on a regular basis and constantly feel out of touch with the rest of the world, including my family. All my free time is spent either daydreaming or going online excessively. I would stop to do something else in a heartbeat, but there doesn’t seem to be anything else worth doing.

The only thing I want to do at the moment is go to university, learn a lot of things, and get my social life back, but even that seems to be impossible.

I had a chance to go there right out of high school but went to community college instead for stupid reasons. I finished an associate’s degree and got accepted again, but now I can’t afford to go. My parents make too much for me to get enough aid to cover the whole cost and aren’t going to help me at all. They won’t cosign anything or have anything to do with it, and I have $8k to come up with by August, which isn’t going to happen.

My siblings and I have always been poor in all but quantifiable means, because of my parents’ lack of concern for our needs. I have been able to live in their house, and for that I owe them everything and have no business asking them for help. Since I was 13, I wouldn’t eat or get any personal items unless I bought them on my own because my parents claimed to have no money. They are selfish and squander all their money. Even when my grandma died, all they cared about doing was getting my grandpa into a nursing home so they could sell the house they had lived in for the past 30 years. They then took that money and went to Vegas.

Call my parents correct and me disordered for not agreeing with them or whatever; I really don’t care.

I’m so disconnected from reality right now that I just know that I’m never going to make it in the world. Nobody in their right mind would hire me to a job if I quit the one I’m in now, and that one just makes me want to die – I wash dishes in a restaurant and have been doing the same thing for the past 5 years. The guy is friends with my dad, so the only way I’d be able to get away from it is to completely move out of town, which brings me back to the previous point.

I feel completely hopeless all the time. I attempted suicide in Feb 2010 with carbon monoxide but chickened out at the last minute. I don’t want to die, but I don’t know any possible way to solve my problems.